Well, 2014 is turning out not to be the very good year we assumed we deserved. From 9/11 on, we have been struggling with unexpected crisis. We figured we were entitled to a break. Now Ebola is a reality. Our nest egg is threatened with the volatile stock market. And, who knows how many military conflicts we will enter - and not be able to exit easily.
Healing. Physical wounds heal. Emotional ones may never. In books like "Wave" by 2004 tsunami survivor Sonali Deraniyalgal we have it confirmed that, at best, human beings can change post-trauma. Those changes can equip them to put together a new life. Likely they will never stop longing for the old one.
Instead of "healing," leverage terminology such as "changing," "opening to what is," and "becoming stronger."
Forgiveness. That meme may never really resonate in America. We come from Puritan and immigrant stock. Both have strong, judgmental value systems. At best we can be encouraged to forgive ourselves. I perceived that several women from the Seton Hill, Greensburg, Pennsylvania Class of 1967 bullied me when I was trying to put together a professional comeback. A shaman advised forgiving them and, get this, pray that they themselves heal. Not for me.
Journey. Those on any kind of journey cause our eyes to glaze over. We want guidance on what to do right now. I dumped a soulmate from my hometown of Jersey City, New Jersey. That person's journey bored me. I learned nothing from it on how to cope with what is in my own life
Failure. Celebrating failure is cool. But it still is failure. The forces in the universe punish us. Reframe that as "brutal learning experiences."
Communications can become productive again. Before we all became over-educated we found out what we needed to survive from talking with the guy in the next cave. You bet, we listened. Unfortunately, when anyone defaults into platitudes, we will probably never pay attention to that person again.