As we all know, hurt people hurt, especially themselves. That's why Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh's book RECONCILIATION can be so useful. He presents the way out from the pain of childhood.
Unfortunately, the subtitle of the book is HEALING THE INNER CHILD. For most of us who had tried everything to deal with our suffering, we did our inner child work and likely it didn't prove effective. Despite his use of that phrase, his take is liberating. He contends the wounds exist at a cellular level. Once we admit their existence in us, then we're on our way. That's because we become capable of empathy. We can ferret out that wounded inner child in those who have created and then added to our suffering. Not that we want a relationship with them. But the memory of what they did or we thought they did can no longer cast spells on us.
The pay off is that, no matter the current suffering, we can manage it. That frees us of the worst of the whole enchilada: the fear that we might suffer.
The book is available in paperback at book stores and online.