Criticism, Way Over-rated

Thirteen positive, some downright glowing, responses came in to me and the print publication's editor about an article I wrote.  One critical one also came in.  I reflected on the critical one at length.  Both because it took be aback (especially its sarcasm) and because I got to wondering, is there something inherently wrong with criticism?

In education, work life, psychotherapy, criticism is positioned as a necessary and useful tool.

But I can't honestly recall any bit of criticism which I used, or, better put, was able to use.  Moreover, much of it turned out to be wrong, at least for me or my situation. Maybe criticism isn't quite the wonderful growth-facilitator it's been made out to be. 

How I learned, advanced, stopped self-defeating behavior has been and is essentially on my own. Okay, there have been folks out there making suggestions, but not criticizing in the conventional sense of asserting "X is wrong" and "Y is right."  They threw out alternatives to what I was doing that I could consider. 

Interesting to note: In twelve-step programs, proven effective in dealing with addictions, criticism isn't allowed.  Only recommendations.   

Isn't criticism, at its core, really just someone's opinion about how we should be navigating this thing called life? (Think about our mothers.)  When that person has power, such as in the role of professor, boss or counselor when we're at a low that criticism can have profound negative impacts.  Directly, as with getting fired.  Or indirectly as with a blow to confidence or trust in our instincts.

Maybe institutions should re-think the right of its members to so freely dispense criticism.  And maybe civilians out there responding to an article such as mine can accomplish more in the arena of ideas by positioning their comment as a different point of view, not censure.

Full Disclosure:  My first semester in graduate school an essay I submitted was harshly criticized.  Thirty years later that seminar, professor and assignment still turn up in some combination or permutation in my nightmares.